People Pleaser

All of my life I have been a major People Pleaser.

I struggle constantly with not making decisions because of it. Well maybe struggled is not the right word... I just don't do it.

When asked where to eat I only give my opinion with someone I know doesn't have a preference at all and it must be someone I am super extremely close too. Usually only with someone who wants to please me as much as I want to please others.

I do not like to choose movies anymore incase someone I am with will not enjoy my choice... so I would rather just watch their choice and watch mine later.

I am not sure where my "people pleasing" comes from but I have been this way as long as I can remember.

 I do not like conflict so I just go with whatever choices the other person makes.

I have recently noticed though that it is keeping me from standing up for myself in some situations.

*****I do make my own decisions... I am not just a follower but in decisions where it will really not effect me at all is when I choose to sit back and let others choose.*****

You know that part in You Got Mail, when Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks are emailing back and forth about her inability to spout off what she is thinking to someone, some not nice snide remark that she just can't say and he tells her he does it all the time and she would not like the way it made her feel.

I wish sometimes that I could be that person.. that person who just says it like she thinks it, who doesn't care about the consequences, who isn't completely worried about hurting feelings because what she is saying is the truth.

I don't want  to make comments that would hurt anyone's feelings, that is so not what I am talking about.

I have ALOT of drama currentlly circulating my life and I wish I could just tell people like it is.. the stuff that no one else has the guts to say to them... the stuff that I see so clearly and they can't accept.

I might be talking in circles but it just one of those days!

My point is that sometimes I keep my mouth shut and let it all get bottled up inside, I listen to people talk, and gossip and misinterperet and wish so badly I could just waylay them with a BAM of insight to make them shut their mouths and think twice before spreading gossip.

I want to work on not being mute and accepting what people tell me but stickin  up for myself and those I love with the truth.


Here is one thing I do know... I am 25 and feel much much more mature than most of the adults I know. You know what you hated about high school, the gossiping the side choosing, the secret telling... that NEVER goes away! People do not really grow up... we are surrounded by high school behaviour for the rest of our lives.

I am ready to revolt!
I'll let ya know how it goes!