Last night I sat across the table from my Mom at a restaurant we have been visiting since I was in Elementary school probably longer I just can't remember that far back, Olive Garden.
Mom and I were on our own, a rarety, Drew was at school and Nana didn't feel like getting out.
I sat across from her looking at the woman she is, strong and able bodied, beautiful inside and out, with a mind that will not cooperate. I sat watching her as she scanned the menu not quite able to pick out what it was she wanted. Her confusion coming from her lips and I thought about the countless dinners we have had at Olive Garden over the years, with our family both extended and immediate, with my friends, with Gary, with ex boyfriends, with Drew. Memories made and moments celebrated at Olive Garden and I couldn't help but feel like it had somehow betrayed her last night by causing her confusion in what to order. I have gotten pretty good and knowing what Mom want's to eat at different restaurants. She has about three meals she rotates between at Olive Garden but without clear pictures to illustrate what it is she struggles with commiting to a entree. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I looked at how far she has fallen, how much her mind has betrayed her and how much she has left to give of herself to this world, to my child, to me. I hate Alzheimer's.... I hate what it has stolen from us, from her. It is a selfish disease that takes innocent people as victims and doesn't care about those left in the wake.
No comments:
Post a Comment