Bike Ride

I have been trying to get Mom's bike over to our house for AWHILE so we can all go riding together. Drew and I love to go riding on our bikes, especially since we are so close to downtown now, it makes for a fun ride. Patrick and I got Mom a bike for Mother's Day last year and I only saw her ride it that day.

Tuesday night we finally got over to Mom and Nana's house at a decent hour to get the bike and Mom. Of course we caught her a little off guard and she was suprised to see us there to get her. Nevermind that we DID call first. Her mood was borderline tolerable and I tried to talk her down the best I could. My husband walked in the room and with one joke put a smile on her face and she was ready.

We had so much fun riding around our neighborhood and I am ashamed to say I tired first. I think Mom had been saving all her energy for it.

Seeing her ride her bike, was like watching a child. Her grin from ear to ear, not following the rules of the road but creating her own, riding past dogs being walked and calling out "Hey Puppy Puppy!!" She was having a blast and we were having so much fun watching her.

As we took her home she said "OK lets go again tomorrow!"

First house guest

Sometimes I look across the room at Drew and I still can't believe he is MY HUSBAND! We are married! It still baffles me at times.

Moving on now.

We played Ellen Degenerous' new game "Heads Up" at the table at BDubs... so fun!! I am pretty sure I won, Drew and LB kept cheating :)

Laura Beth came into town this weekend and it was such a nice refresher! It is just good to be around a positive person who truly loves  you for who you are and not your failures or mistakes! We both so enjoyed having her at our house as our first guest. We went and saw the Great Gatsby this weekend, second time was just as good as the first! We then hit up some antique stores on 6th Street to find some treasures for her house. Being with Laura Beth is always fun and easy... no stress, no worries, just laughter!

Sunday Drew woke up early and planted the flowers that mom bought me on Friday night. We now have lots of flowers covering our porch and flower beds to welcome anyone who comes over. My goal is to just keep them alive now!

Sunday after church we joined Mom, Nana, and a couple from their church for lunch. The couple, Joann and Warlick Thomas, had invited us two weeks ahead of time and Nana kept reminding me about it before hand. It was a nice lunch together getting to hear stories about "the good ole days." The Thomas' are such a sweet couple who have great affection for our family!

Wedding Week: Part 4

With Nana safely tucked in our suite with her oxygen my mind was able to being focusing on what we were all in Sana Fe for... Drew and I  were getting MARRIED!

The Friday night rehearsal was fastly approaching and the out of town guests were arriving in droves. I escaped from sitting on the patio with Colton and Bailey to get myself ready for the nights events. With my makeup done, my tshirt, shorts, and houseshoes on Drew drug me across the resort to greet his Dad and Step-mom. I was wanting so badly to look like a put together bride but I fear I came off a bit, umm homeless shall we say? After showing them around for a few minutes I scurried off to finish putting myself together.

I had two dresses to choose from and ended up going with a black and white color block fitted dress. Comfortable and Flattering.

Our rehearsal was set to begin at promptly 5:00 and when I arrived on the lawn for it there were a ton of people all ready. It was a bit overwhelming and very exciting! We got things started with a prayer before David our wedding planner kickstarted our rehearsal. I kept looking around at all the people so happy to have everyone I loved in one place together.

Coordinating a wedding party for rehearsal is hard. I have experienced this from Starlight. People don't listen, people are distracted, people don't care! The boys are always the hardest to wrangle in.

My brothers were serving as escorts for guests and also walking me down the aisle. This proved to be a little overwhelming for Ryan during rehearsal. I remember what it felt like when Neeley was getting married, overwhelming, immense emotions, excitement, joy but knowing things were changing and not sure how, being so proud to see your sister make this move, uncontrolable tears. Ryan was emotional at Neeley's wedding so I knew mine would be no cake walk for him. My brother is so precious, so loving. He lost his emotions early into the rehearsal and had a tough time regaining it.

I was focused on making sure everything was going as I wanted, the order, the attendants, the parents. Mom had a tough time keeping in her spot during rehearsal as she wanted to chit chat with people and mill about. As stressed as I might have been it was a joy to watch everyone's interactions and emotions. I remember looking at Drew listening closely to our minister and the wedding planner trying to keep order around him.

I stood to the side with Aunt Tammy as my rock next to me. David would ask something I hadn't thought of or bring up an alternative method and I would look at her for encouragement and advice. She quietly guided him toward what I desperately wanted but was unable to vocalize.

At the end of our rehearsal it began to rain. I loved it! It felt like a good omen moving forward into the rest of the planned events. Like God's blessing pouring over us.

Our Great Escape Artists

I am so glad this week is ending. It feels like it has been a looonnnggg one. Probably because my spare moments have been so full of things to get done. I am looking forward to a little relaxation this weekend.

I wanted to share a few pics from our house with yall. I love the home we have created together. Such a comfortable and cozy place to retreat to. We are slowly getting to know the neighbors. Some have been watching us work so hard on the yard ( ok Drew has been working hard, I have just planted a few things and sat outside drinking tea while he works ) that they have been cleaning up and fixing up their own houses. I don't know if it is comforting or nerve racking when a stranger says "You have the best house on the block for sure!" Anyway we are excited the people around us are showing a little pride of their own. Maybe soon we will have a neighborhood cookout, Not likely!

Front door, complete with a homemade wreath and chalk board Welcome sign

Still questioning the "girly" chair pads but loving my wedding lanterns on the table. This is my favorite reading spot in the evenings, and my favorite place to watch my husband work :)

Baker's Rack that you see when you walk in the front door. I got those awesome burlap candle holders from Neeley and Lane for my Bday and I really like our Neal est. sign at the top.

We have been having a few struggles with our dogs as of late. Buster is turning into quite the escape artist. Recently he has been nawing and scratching some old pickets in the back yard that line the driveway to go out on a little adventure. Drew and I came home from a movie one night to find both dogs in the driveway waiting to greet us. Drew got new posts, to replace the ones Buster broke and moved their dog houses in front of part of the fence so they might lay in there instead of escaping. That worked for a couple of days...

Wednesday I was out running errands with Mom on a long lunch break and got a call they were out again. I pulled down our street to see Cooper sitting on the front porch and Buster halfway down the street just standing in the middle of it. They both came running to me, I am sure they were beyond grateful to see me and not their dad. Buster had busted through 3 pickets this time. It looked like a war zone. I am sure Cooper was just glad to go along for a little adventure with his brother.

Needless to say we are re-evaluating how to contain our escape artists during the day while we are at work. Cooper is at the groomer today so no telling what Buster will get into on his own :) But we love them anyway!

We are having our first overnight guest tonight... Laura Beth we are so excited!

I hope you all have  an absolutely wonderful weekend!!

A newlywed lesson

I learned something about my husband last night.

Often when asking him questions ranging from, "What sides do you want with the steaks tonight?" to "Do you want to go to the 10:30 opening of a movie tonight." Drew's response will be, "It's whatever you want Megan" or " I just want you to be happy."

What a sweet response! is what I would always think or just answer the dang question!

But last night after a series of questions he repeatedly answered like that  I gave up. I don't like being the one to make decisions, especially without you voicing your opinion. I always assumed his responses just meant he didn't want to tell me what he really wanted.

Last night we were discussing a topic that would no doubt change our lives drastically. His response was the same as above. We talked a little bit longer and dropped the subject.

Later last night after mentioning we missed the 10:30 premiere of the Great Gatsby he said, "I know and I really wanted to go." I replied with "No! you said it's whatever I wanted." He informed me that if he says No that means No but anything other than No pretty much means Yes.

Good to know that only 2 and a half years into a relationship I have FINALLY cracked his language. I do feel better since these responses have pretty much just started since we got married so really it is only took me a month and a half to crack the case!

That should make making decisions easier in the future.

*Drew has been practicing with my camera taking pictures to help me this summer with weddings, these are all some he took of the dogs and I*

The Blanton Place for Encouragement

This weekend was such a wonderful occasion for our family. After many years of hard work by The High Plains Children's Center, The Blanton Place for Encouragement was officially opened.

While I was finishing ACU some very dear friends of Nana and Grandy's presented the idea for an activity center to be built in their honor at the High Plains Children's Home in Amarillo. Grandy along with some other elders were on the board that started the home in the 1967. 

Several years ago during a celebration weekend in Amarillo for Grandy's birthday the family all toured the campus and saw the pasture that would one day become this great building. It was said many times this weekend that although Grandy did not know exactly what the building would become he knew it would be incredible.

Last year those of us who could came out for the ground breaking on the plot of land and almost a year exactly this weekend was the official "Open House." In my mind I wasn't picturing anything as beautiful as the building that would be referred to lovingly as "The Blanton."

A stone facade, water sculpture, wood beams in a vaulted ceiling and massive flat screen TVs all in a place proudly blaring my Grandparent's names. This place is gorgeous, humble and every bit a wonderful representation of them. 

Nana, Mom, Aunt Tammy, Aunt Cindy, Patrick, Neeley, Lane, Erich & Ginna, Nicholas & Gaylen with their kids and Drew and I all were on hand to greet all the people whose lives were touched by Nana and Grandy and the Children's home. Bob & Jo Wilburn who gave money to start the building came in for the celebration. Nana looked beautiful and beamed as precious memories of Grandy were spoken.  

This part of the Children's Home is the home to special needs adults who live in cottages surrounding The Blanton and will use the building as a center to fellowship with one another. It was named the place of encouragement because one of the most commonly used words to describe Nana and Grandy was the encouragement for others in everything they did.

I could not be prouder to have Blanton in my blood and this weekend was no exception. 

Below is the article the Amarillo Globe News printed on the front page of the today section about the event.

High Plains Children’s Home and Family Services on Saturday dedicated and opened the new 6,000-square-foot Blanton Place for Encouragement.

“The Blanton Place for Encouragement is an activity center or community center for our adults with special needs who live in Pa and Megan’s Place,” said Craig Howard, executive director of High Plains Children’s Home and Family Services. “This is an independent living community for adults with special needs which is a part of High Plains home.”

The Blanton Place will feel more like a student union on a college campus, Howard said.

“They’ll come over here, play games, hang out and develop their social skills,” he said. “It’s just a beautiful place.”

the facility was named in honor of Dr. Everett and Peggy Blanton for their long-standing history with the children’s home.

Peggy Blanton said she never imagined it would turn out like this.

“My husband and I were in the original group that started the children’s home,” she said. “We were excited to build old cottages for the foster kids but I never envisioned that we would have a building like this.”

Everett Blanton, who died of cancer in 2010, was able to see the site that would become the Blanton Place, Peggy Blanton said.

“It was just nothing but brown dirt out here,” she said. “It blows my mind to think if he could just walk in here and see it now. I was overwhelmed and emotional with just the bare walls up.”

Established in 1967 by the Church of Christ, the High Plains Children’s Home is a Texas chartered nonprofit organization that aims “to establish, maintain, endow and operate a home for children and adults with special needs who are orphaned, neglected, abused, dependent, underprivileged or otherwise taken advantage of.” according to the children’s home information.

Kevin Logan, director of adults with special needs, said the Blanton Place will provide a safe place for its residents to socialize and visit.

“Because of the social disability a lot of them do have, this gives them a secure place to socialize with others like them because it’s hard to do so with others that do not have a disability,” Logan said. “They just don’t make friends with them very well and this gives them a place that will help them feel more independent.”

The Blanton Place will also be open and available to the community, Howard said.

“People from the community can also come out and use the facility for special events as well,” he said.

A date with Kelsey and the Ducks

A few nights ago I had the honor of hanging out with my bestie Kelsey! I try to spend time with her when I can but I admittedly have not spent very much time with anyone lately. Kelsey asks continously sending sweet texts like, We need to hang out soon. She is always welcoming me to particpate in what she is doing. I wanted to make sure our time together was quality. She is a true treasure that is often taken for granted.

We scheduled our date several days in advance. Nothing was going to keep me from our time together. I was trying to think of something fun and different to do. My pocketbook was a little on the empty side.

I decided on cooking chicken and rice at our house for us and then going to the park to feed the ducks. I picked Kelsey up as soon as I got off work. She ran to the door and greeted me with the biggest smile and hug!

We headed to my house to finish dinner. We sat on the porch while waiting for it to finish. Kelsey helped me fix the salad. We ate dinner while Drew mowed the lawn and then we were off to the ducks.

I stopped to buy a whole loaf of bread for our outing but we definitely should have had more than one. We laughed as they fought over the scraps we threw to them.

It was such a perfect night spent with a perfect girl! Kelsey has had trouble with "friends" in school this semester and it breaks my heart as it does her Mom and Sisters. There is nothing I would like more than to protect her from the pain of mean girls.

She is truly a gift from God for us here on Earth. I am blessed by the time we spend together!

Wedding Week: Part Three

Friday morning before our wedding I woke up with the most massive headache of my life. No doubt from all the crying I did the day before. I decided that to make this wedding what I wanted it to be, perfect, I  would have to start with changing my attitude.
My plan all along was this... Friday morning I would wake up, Neeley and I would have breakfast while the boys all went golfing. My mom would entertain Peyton for Ryan with Nana's help. After our breakfast  Neeley and I would get massages. The problem with my planning is that God's plans are bigger than mine!

So Friday I awoke feeling like crap. Mom went to the hospital with Tammy and Kelsey to be with Nana. Peyton was dropped off with me while the boys went golfing and Neeley came over with coffee. Neeley, Peyton and I ordered room service as I tried to nurse my head back to some normalcy. I had my favorite Santa Fe breakfast, eggs Benedict with red potatoes. After I managed to get myself a shower and Neeley entertained Peyton with a game we took her to Rhonda who had graciously offered to watch her for an hour while we got our massages. Then Neeley and I made our way to the spa at La Posada for an hour of complete relaxation.

Our day in the spa started with changing into robes in the ladies locker room. Neeley and I both being modest to the public hunkered into a handicap bathroom both stripping down to put the robes on. We opened the door to find a woman stark naked in the locker room looking at us like we were crazy for hiding in the bathroom. It was a complete "Sex and the City" moment which made us laugh the rest of the day. We ventured out of the locker room, scared of what we would encounter next, to the waiting area where we sipped berry water. In scheduling the massages Neeley had requested both females out of courtesy to her husband and my soon to be husband... they weren't fond of the idea of having a man massage either of us. So knowing this we were a little shocked when a scrawny middle aged man called my name out for the appointment. "Uh ho!" I thought. this is not going to be the relaxing I was hoping for. I have had male masseuses before so I wasn't uncomfortable with the guy until he kept talking and talking to me. Asking me question after question. I tried to explain I was incredibly stressed, I was getting married the next day and just needed an hour of quiet before chaos erupted. He finally held back on the questions and an hour later that felt like 10 minutes we were through.

I had gotten my manicure and pedicure for the wedding earlier in the week in Amarillo. The gel nail polish I chose however looked to me like it was clear and after the moving of wedding decor I had done I could see black under my nails. I can't walk down the aisle with black under my nails. What about my pictures?! I was to obsessed with my nails looking perfect so when we finished our massages and hadn't received any missed calls telling us of a crisis, I decided to push my luck and have the spa redo my nails. The gel I had put on was a nightmare to get off. My manicurist at La Posada lectured me on the science of gel vs. schlack and how bad the gel is for my nails and yada yada yada. It took her 45 minutes to remove the "clear" color I was so concerned with and another 30 or so to re paint them. I sat in the chair watching time fly by as Neeley kicked it into high gear. She began completing our tasks that were remaining for the day via the phone at my side. Order the breakfast for the bridesmaids in the morning, organize incoming guests and family. She was amazing as she sat by my side calming me and taking care of business. As I could finally see the end of the light on a polish change that seemed to last forever Neeley got a call...

News from Nana had been sparse throughout the day with the for waiting for doctors. When we finally did hear, the news was she should be released soon from the hospital but would be taken  straight home to Amarillo. This news is delivered to my while my manicurist is googling the Internet for and old video of her husbands band to share... not interested! Get me out of here! It took ever fiber of my being to patiently wait for her to finish, pay and leave before my tears started flowing. I absolutely wanted the best for Nana. I certainly did not want her to be there if  it was going to put her in some kind of danger. However I was faced with not having another person at my wedding who I desperately wanted to be there, who I needed there! I was already deeply missing the presence of my Grandy, my Dad, my Mom (in alot of ways) and now no Nana. I was devastated. Neeley soon got a call that family was arriving to the hotel and we needed to meet them soon, Mom had returned from the hospital and needed help with Peyton. There would be no time to process and grieve.

I returned to my hotel suite that was opened to the room Mom and Nana had. Mom was in no better mood towards me than the day before. As she saw my tears she began to question the cause of them. I tried to brush it off but she was insistent. I finally told her that Nana wasn't going to be at the wedding and she responded with a shout that we did not know that yet. Trying to explain the phone call we had just received was useless. I walked outside to call Drew in a panic.  Nana's not coming to the wedding. I need help with my Mom. I can't do this alone! All came out in broken sentences through sobs. Drew didn't skip a beat and said he would be right there. I later realized he made all the guys pack up 8 holes short of what they paid for. At this time he was the only one who realized what not having Nana at my wedding would do to me. The time between our call and when he arrived back at the hotel, which was short, he called and talked to Nana himself. Something I didn't have the courage or composure to do and would never have expected him to. I don't know the details of the conversation but Nana told me later through tears of her own that the call he made meant more to her than he would ever know. He told Nana that her not coming was something that would devastate both of us. That we Both needed her there for our wedding day. That She meant to much to us to not have her present. Drew arrived back to me with the strong arms I desperately needed to be held with. He told me he personally spoke with Nana and she would be staying to attend our wedding. That was the first moment of relief I felt so far in Santa Fe. The first hope of a perfect wedding.

I changed out of the leggings and tank top I had been in since my massage and tried to make myself look like an elated bride. Tenell and Aunt Cindy were the first to arrive to La Posada from out of town. They met us as we sat outside on the terrace snacking on chips and drinking margaritas. It was so wonderful to see them arrive. It seemed to hammer home that there would be a wedding tomorrow and it was mine! Seeing their smiles was a blast of sunshine. Tenell brought me a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Whitney and Laura Beth arrived next. I was so anxious to see them, having not seen either of them in a long time. Whitney had never met Drew and I was excited to see how they interacted. Drew and I met them outside the resort to help with their bags. I was so proud to show off my Fiance' to them and I think Whitney was quickly impressed with my choice. The next hour or so was a combination of greetings, hugs, and laughter as we all reunited on the terrace and explored the grounds.

As we were sitting outside Drew got a call that Nana was being unloaded out front and needed a wheelchair. He went off to bring her in and as she was rolled by our table I rushed over to see her. Seeing her face was an instant relief to me. My emotions unloaded. I hugged her and we both cried on each other's shoulders. She looked me in the eyes and said. "Megan do you remember when you told me you were thinking about getting married and Santa Fe and asked if I would be there? Do you remember what I told you?" Through tears I said "Yes! You said you would be there!" She simply said "And So I will!"

Nana was taken to our room to rest and recover with an oxygen machine. I was told rather curtly by some that she would not be attending any of the nights events, rehearsal, dinner, lingerie shower. That she needed to be inactive to get all her energy back. I didn't care as long as she was at the wedding!

A Dallas kind of weekend

This past weekend Drew and I ventured down to the Big D to hang out with his Dad.

Originally the plan was to take Mom and Nana down with us. Patrick had gotten Kenney Chesney concert tickets for Mom for Christmas and I was first informed it was this weekend... Great! We will just make a weekend out of it and all go down and have a good ole time! Wrong! The weekends got mixed up and the weekend I had planned everything for ended up being the weekend before the concert. Anyway Drew and I just drove down by ourselves because his Dad had already purchased us some tickets for Saturday night's Rangers game and if you know my Husband at all you know we were not missing that game!

We got into Dallas late Friday night and after what I felt like was a justifiable amount of time chit chatting with the Father-in-law without being rude,  I headed to bed. Saturday I slept in a little bit and woke to the smell of bacon and coffee. Delish! We had a great breakfast together before heading out to the Farmer's Market in Dallas.

Have you ever been to a Farmer's Market? I have always wanted to go but I am not one to wake up early on a Saturday for that type of thing. Luckily Dallas' is open all day. They have the most beautiful flowers there. I mean a TON of gorgeous flowers. I would have brought them all back if I had space. They also have herb plants... I never knew I wanted to grow my own herbs until we got there. At one point I had about 5 in my hand and was picking 5 more up when Drew kindly reminded me how tiny our car is. We decided to look for some here instead.

By the time we got to the Farmer's Market my breakfast was wearing thin and looking at all the amazing fruit and vegetables made me hungry! Drew and I spotted a 'Corn-n-Cup' vendor and we snacked on that while browsing.

I settled on some squash and zuchinni to bring home along with some whole green beans that looked great. Would you believe though when we were leaving Dallas we left them behind. Oh Well Drew's Dad will have some great veggies to eat.

After the Farmer's Market we went home to change into our Ranger's gear and head to the ballpark. We purposely didn't eat lunch so we could feast while there. I love the ballpark food! Drew and his Dad had one of those humongous hot dogs, ok I did have a few bites too. My real favorite though was the garlic fries... sooo good!!! The Ranger's started the night off with a home run and finished with winning the game! They played Boston which was fun to watch since I always go see the Yankees play the Rangers. Now I got to see the Yankees rival!

Drew and I headed home Sunday but not before stopping at Pappadeaux for an amazing meal!

I always have a hard time traveling to DFW because it makes me think of my Dad. All the places we went to together and the many many places we didn't. My thoughts were constanly replaying memories I have of us there and all the good times we had. I don't think there will ever be a day I travel that to DFW and don't think about him.. I hope there isnt!

Wedding Week: Part Two

So when Drew and I first started talking about having a wedding in Santa Fe one of the biggest concerns, next to no one coming, was if Nana could be there. I refused to have a wedding that Nana would not be able to attend, after all Nana is not just a grandmother to me she is a second mother and by gosh I wasn't getting married without her. With Nana's health condition and mostly her heart the altitude was a bit of a big question mark in Santa Fe. Several years ago when we used to have a family cabin in New Mexico that Grandy helped build the Schmidt clan, Nana, Grandy and I were spending a week vacation up there... Nana started to have trouble breathing and I had to drive Nana and Grandy home after only being there a day or so. She hadn't returned to the mountains since. She convinced me that she would absolutely be at our wedding should we have it in Santa Fe and so we began to plan.



Fast forward to 6 months later and we have all arrived in Santa Fe on Thursday for a wedding on Saturday. We spent the afternoon walking around and exploring the plaza for a few hours. Drew and I take Nana back to the room to rest for a bit while we meet with our wedding coordinator to go over the mountains of boxes full of decor we have brought. After a quick and productive meeting organizing and explaining my vision for the wedding we head back to the suite Mom, Nana and I are sharing. There we find that Aunt Tammy has arrived and has called in oxygen from some Amarillo doctors for Nana who has felt dizzy and lightheaded since arriving. While we wait for the oxygen and give her some time to acclimate to the surroundings the rest of the family sits out on the patio by the fire drinking a much deserved beer. It is getting dark outside and we begin to realize that we need dinner.  My brothers, Peyton, Neeley, Lane, Drew and I begin to figure out what our options might be for dinner. At this moment in time Aunt Tammy announces she is staying with Nana and everyone should go eat dinner without her. Rhonda and her kids are here and decide they will do their own thing. Next thing I know my Mom is extremely anxious and upset, about what I am not sure... I see Rhonda chasing after her as she is headed off somewhere at the resort with her purse in hand. I try to talk to Mom after chasing after them  but I am at this moment the absolutely wrong person to address her issues, this happens sometimes and I credit Alzheimer's disease for this.... Instead of responses I get blank stares of anger. I retreat back to my brother's hotel room for cover and Neeley goes out to try and talk Mom down. Eventually we decide to go for dinner and trudge on with the night. As I am waiting valet to bring up or car with Drew we run into Rhonda who is getting her car to take Nana to the hospital. Drew gets a wheelchair and finds Nana sitting on a bench with Aunt Tammy in the middle of the resort to tired to make it to the car. Nana makes it to the car, she goes to the ER with Aunt Tammy and Rhonda and we decide that instead of the rest of us ALL going to sit in the hospital the best thing is to continue with our plan to eat. I am immediately worried sick about Nana and what is happening but try to put on my game face... luckily I have my rock in Drew beside me who keeps me standing up, unfortunately his job will get tougher as the night goes on.



Mom, Patrick, Ryan, Neeley, Lane, Kelsey, Peyton, Drew and I are all eating at the San Fransisco Bar and Grill for an interesting New Mexican dinner. I have managed to work my way back into my Mom's good graces with us both offering apologies without either of us knowing what for. Peyton keeps us entertained through dinner by painting her face with dark brown eye shadow and covering her lips with lip gloss. She would look up at me and ask how she looks to which I would respond Oh So Beautiful Princess! As we are preparing to leave the restaurant I must have looked at my Mom wrong or mis-stepped because she was at once given me terrible looks and not speaking to me. I am at my wits end by this point feeling as though the way I am being treated by Mom, who at this time in my life I want to be sharing each moment and enjoying this special time with, is completely unjust. After we part angrily, Mom to the hospital to visit Nana and Drew and I decide to walk the mile to La Posada from the restaurant. It is in these quiet walks with Drew when I feel like I want to collapse from exhaustion, Drew keeps me focused on what is the meaning of the moment. Reminding me constantly that this weekend is about he and I, about our commitment to one another, our bond, and strength in our relationship. He reminds me that this is not my Mom but Alzheimer's rearing it's ugly head with it's personality that causes these tantrums.

We returned to my hotel room where my fears and tears worsened once we received news that the Doctor's evaluating Nana thought she might have had a heart attack. It is in the moments that I turn to prayer but my mind also seeks out the worst resolution... Nana not making it to the wedding, Nana dying in Santa Fe and it being all my fault, Why did we have to have our stupid wedding here, we need to call it off.
As my brother's kept my Mom in their room Drew let me cry uncontrollably on the bed for what felt like hours. At some point late in the evening desperately waiting for news and seeking some comfort. I turned to my closest friends for prayers sending out an urgent text to them. These few who knew how important Nana is to me. Mom came back to the room and we drifted off to sleep without anymore news from the hospital.

1 Month

One Month ago today I became Mrs. Neal.

It has been a very fast month full excitement about the future.

We are learning new things about one another constantly.

Our favorite time is being home together after work cooking a simple meal together.

I am trying to get him to read more so I can complete my vision of us lying in bed together reading or sitting on our patio reading. As of now it is just me reading and him doing anything else to keep himself entertained.

So here is to one month being married and many many more to come!

In the Miami airport on our way home from our honeymoon!