That being said, unfortunately with the current journey I am walking through there are some dark days. Moments of complete distraught, complete helplessness, and moments of total hoplesness. These days are just as important as the good days because they are a testiment of the love our father shines on us because even in the dark days we make it through with him by our sides.
These days most often come from confusion caused by a disease eating away at a young 53 year old woman's brain. Confusion which creates characteristical changes, mood changes, and behavioral changes.
The darkness can cause you to forget years of happy memories created from a nurturing mother's love. It can cause you to mistake the harsh words spoken through confusion as for ones of reality. It makes the pain unbearable. It makes the sadness feel deathly.
It's these days I loathe this disease. I hate what it is doing to my Mom. In these moments I can't help but ask why? Why is this happening to her, to us?
Sometimes there are just dark days but we get through them. You force a smile on your face and you continue on. You wait for the next day of sun to shine on your face, and eventually your smile doesn't feel so forced.
