Hating it.

I sat in Red Lobster tonight across from my Mom watching as she cried because she could not remember what she likes to eat there. She got frustrated at trying to remember what it was and tired of people trying to help her so she told the waiter she wasn't eating. She sat there and I could see the fear, and sadness mixed with frustration and anger all over her face. I sat feeling helpless as she was not interested in any help at that moment. I let tears roll down my face as I thought how wrong this is. She should not have to go through this.... not at her age! Not yet! Last night she seemed so angered so easily, so un-interested in what was going on around her, so not like my mother. I was told it is just a phase of the disease and that she would come through it but I realized it is progressing, it is tearing her apart and I don't know how to stop it. I don't know what to do it make it better, easier for her, for me. I hate the feeling of being completely out of control and so unable to help her. I hate it! I Hate what it's doing to her!

Halloween Party

For Halloween we had a little party at our house with our friends. We were super excited to pass out candy to little trick or treaters. There is something about the spirit of Halloween that even at 25 it is still fun to dress up and even though I didn't go trick or treating had just as much fun eating good food with my friends in our costumes and handing out candy at the front door.

Here is the outside of our house. Aunt Tammy wasn't using their Halloween decorations this year since they just moved so she let us use them. A Black light, some flashing lights (one of which makes creepy witch sounds), a trick or treat sign, a fog machine that was a dud, and Christmas lights to add a little bit of bright cheer. Oh and a Creepy Mummy in the doorway.

We kept our door open and were dying for kids to come to our house but since we live on a cul-de-sac and not many of our neighbors were participating we did not get a lot of traffic. Of course the kids that did come were to scared to come to the doorway, might have had something to do with these two creepers...

 

Drew and Lane had complained about their costumes the night before and just hours earlier but as soon as they realized they were a little bit scary to kids they were eating it up! Drew would stand still against the wall while the kids walked by scared to death and he would just move his head at them. Lane would silently follow kids around the block with his hands behind his back. When the trick or treaters hit a total lull they would go stand on the street corner under lights to scare people.

We had so much candy we were practically begging kids to come get some, handing it out on the street to anyone interested. We still have so much it will probably show up in some Christmas stockings.

We had a festive little arrangement and lots of yummy food to keep us occupied for the night.

I made these white chocolate bones I found on Pinterest. So festive and SO easy, I got stick pretzels and large marshmallows from the Dollar Tree, some white chocolate to dip them in and you have this tasty little treat.

I also tried my first shot at Sausage balls, also a recipe found on Pinterest, such an easy snack and incredibly delicious! Definitely be making these again.

Neeley made these jalepeno cream cheese crossiant bites that were so stinking good!

Brandais made these super cute cake bites that looked like eye balls and she made some chocolate peanut butter ones that I loved!

Aunt Tammy gave me this awesome Edgar Alan Poe Poem book in my Halloween basket, yes I get a Halloween basket because my Aunt is AMAZING! I hope it never stops, not even when I have kids of my own :) Anyway the book was so cool and creepy looking I stuck it on the coffee table as decoration for the night.

What a pair! I am not sure what either of us really were but we were happy to be hanging out together.

I got this idea to make a Butterfly headpiece from Martha Stewart. I wasn't planning on really dressing up I just thought it would be fun to have a cool head piece.

Here was my inspiration...           




 

I really liked the look so I went to Hobby Lobby and Michaels and bought a ton of Butterflies with coupons and added some Dollar Tree glitter to spice them up to make my headpiece.

I was reallyhappy with how it turned out although it was really heavy in my hair. I did end up getting butterfly wings to wear with it. Max kept calling me Mother Nature and Kelsey called me a Social Butterfly so I'm not quite sure what it was. But now I have all the butterflies to use on a spring wreath!

Here are all of us that dressed up: Drew as Scarecrow Scream Ghost, Me as butterfly queen or whatever, Lane as the Grim Reaper, Neeley as a Mummy, Brandais as a Pirate, and Brent as a 300 Spartan.

Neeley did my makeup and hers and did an AMAZING job at them! We had so much fun together. We also took time to draw for Secret Santa for Christmas while we were all together. Another fun Party to have in December!

There is a Zoo in the middle of town!

Saturday, after I slept in till a ridiculous hour, I jaunted on over to my mom's house and somehow talked her into going to Sam's with me for Dog bones. (They have good rawhides, like 20 of them for only $10, Unbeatable!) Anyway, she like a sweet mom agreed and Kelsey came to keep us company. On our way Kelsey was telling us about a "zoo" that was set up in the TJMAXX parking lot. Always a sucker for some wild animals we drove by and would you believe there was a Free mini zoo set up right in the middle of the TJMAXX parking lot! NUTZ!

 

 

It wasn't all FREE to see of course, they had to make money somewhere and it was seeing the white tiger. We walked around and looked at the Bengal Tiger, some monkeys, lion cubs, goats, llamas, and a cow (yes that's right... a Cow, right next to the lion cubs) and then I convinced Mom and Kels it was time to go. As we were walking a way and Mom started weeping at the animals, I grabbed my wallet and paid the $3.00 for us all to see the White Tiger... the look on her face made it all worth it! (You will have to trust me on that since I didn't get any photos of her face)

 

Kelsey was loving it too!

I cannot imagine not believing in a God, especially when you have the chance to see such rare and beautiful animals, all unique in their own right and serving a specific and crucial part to our Earth. It was such a fun little Saturday adventure!

And finally, Proof that my own special unique animal is maturing... I snuck this photo of Cooper as he slept by my bed. 

 He has been sleeping there no problems for the past 3 nights. I am one proud mama!

It snowed...in October

Yesterday morning we woke up to quite the suprise...



We had about 2 inches of snow covering the ground! CRAY-ZAY!! Kept snowing till late in the afternoon and was absolutely Beautiful!

Cooper went to his second obedience class this week. He sits on command really well and is now good at "down" as in laying down. I have been trying really hard to spend a few minutes everyday working on commands with him. He seems to not really be interested in learning at the house right now so we have been walking to the park to practice till he gets more focused.

He really liked playing in the snow at the park yesterday while we trained. I am trying to get him to "Stay" for a longer period of time. We also worked hard on his "leave it" command which he gets the jest of after the first few reminder times.

After we got home last night I was in complete shock because he just laid down in my room and watched me re-arrange my closet. HE JUST WATCHED ME! This was huge for him because usually he has to have something to focus on like a bone or toy. I even freaket a bit when I noticed he had snuck away, I was so sure he was getting in to the pizza that was for dinner or destroying some Halloween decorations... NOT AT ALL! He was just laying on the floor in the living room and as soon as I walked in he rolled over on his back wanting a belly rub. I think he was a little tired of hearing me yell at the Rangers as they let game 6 slip from them in the 9th, 10th and 11th innings. But I was still so SO proud of him!

Big night for Cooper and I! He even slept inside on the floor by my bed until 4 am when he needed to go potty. Hopefully we can work on that and get him to sleep soundly through the night inside with me!

One Year

Sunday Drew and I celebrated our 1 year anniversary together! I honestly CANNOT believe that it has been one year since we started dating. It feels at times like it was just yesterday he spilled water on me on our first date and then it feels like we have been dating for a decade.

Sunday morning when before we left for church he suprised me with this BEA-UTIFUL bouquet of red roses. I am personally not a huge rose fan but these were stunning!

I gave him a bottle of True Religion cologne from Drug Imporium... they sell mainstream scents there for a fraction of the cost. However for the fraction I did not get a box with the cologne so it looked a little jicky. He has wanted that cologne for a while and could care less about the box so it all worked out.

After church we went to eat out and then got pumpkins to carve. Before I could carve any pumkins though I needed a good ole Sunday afternoon nap while he watched the Cowboys, who FINALLY won a game!



We had a fun time together carving pumkins after the Cowboys game and while waiting on my meatloaf to cook. He LOVES meatloaf and is probably the ONLY person who could get me to make it for him.

I went with a white pumkin this year. Drew kept telling me it was too small but when I was finished cleaning it out and carving it long before him he realized why I got such a small one.

Our pumkins in all their glory... I totally think we should  make this a yearly anniversary tradition. So much FUN!  Mine is supposed to be a mummy with pennies as eyes. Drew of course did an AWESOME job on his scary pumkin face.

It was such a wonderful, chill day to celebrate with him.  I am so blessed by him and his calming influence in my life. I learn new things about him everyday and appreciate how much he struggles to be the best man he can be for me. He stands up for me and tries to protect me even when I think I don't need it and listens to all my "i'm overwhelmed" breakdowns. I love and adore him!

Shrimp Con Queso

Since we didn't do the Alzheimer's walk on Saturday I decided that after I slept in a little bit it would be a great day for Mom and I to make Shrimp Con Queso.

This is a dish that my Mom has made during the Fall/Winter seasons as long as I can remember. I remembered it always being a BIG deal when she made it for us. It was always a very special night.

I have been craving this dish for such a long time because I don't think she has made it for the couple of years. Neeley and I have talked about wanting it as soon as Mom got here.

We went to the store yesterday to gather our ingredients and invited all of the family over to celebrate the season with us.

The recipe is in our Powell Family Cookbook but Mom originally got it from our dear friend Linda Talley in Alvin.

The recipe is pretty simple actually, I was amazed I never took the time to look it up and try to make it myself. Things are always better when Mom makes them anyway.

I cannot believe that I totally forgot to take pictures of the finished product, but the best part of the day was cooking with my mom!

Tired at the end of a long week

SOOO Thankful it is Friday! This week has really kicked my butt.

After a lot of consideration I am really extremely sad to report that we are going to have to skip the Alzheimer's walk this year. Everyone here is busy with stuff going on and mom doesn't feel like she could actually walk in it and I do not feel confident leaving her sitting on the side by herself. I really thought it would be a great opportunity for her to feel surrounded and supported but it looks like this year it won't be happening.

With everything that has been going on  I have not fundraised for the Walk at all. I posted here and on Facebook but never really made it a need. We did get one donation from an AMAZING family member. Someone who I feel like in the midst of complete chaos knows what it feels like to have their world crumple around them. She has walked with such amazing Grace through hardships and challenges. She too has been deeply impacted by Alzheimer's disease in her own immediate family. When I feel discouraged I look at her and find the strength to carry on. Nancy Thank you so very very much for your donation! You are such a light in my life.Thank you for all your support and love!!

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I talked to Christie last night about my Dad. He had a surgery this morning to remove the port in his shoulder area. He is very succeptible to infection right now. He is still not quite up and moving around yet. He is able to eat real food but doesn't have the appetite for it.

They doctor's have confirmed that the tumor moved around in his abdomen and that is what caused the holes. They said he was very very very sick for a couple weeks before it actually burst, while the holes were probably ripping and then was in excruciating pain when it actually burst open.

The nurses and directors at Marie Crowley have told Christie and Dad that they have several Clinical Trials for him to be a part of once he is up and moving around and ready to go through that again. They also said the tumor used to be the size of a Grapefruit and is now the size of an orange... but are not sure what caused that change. I am ecstatic about that news!

Next week sometime, with no more complications over the weekend, they are hoping he will be able to be moved to an Acute Care Facility in Grapevine, which is closer to home. They will help change the dressings on his Wound Vac, that is what is closing up his incision, and help him with the physical therapy he is needing to move around.

He is still slipping in and out of clear communication. The nurses say this is normal, that he is dead tired, fighting infection, has not eaten and it is a symptom of that. I know he is ready to go home and getting sadder and more depressed with each day he remains there. I wish so badly I were closer to cheer him up. Instead I am sending up continual prayers for his recovery!


I feel like I could sleep ALL DAY tomorrow! Happy Weekend!